In that place between wakefulness and dreams, I found myself in the room. There were no distinguishing features except for the one wall covered with small index card files. They were like the ones in libraries that list titles by author or subject in alphabetical order. But these files, which stretched from floor to ceiling and seemingly endless in either direction, had very different headings. As I drew near the wall of files, the first to catch my attention was one that read "Girls I have liked." I opened it and began flipping through the cards. I quickly shut it, shocked to realize that I recognized the names written on each one. And then without being told, I knew exactly where I was.
This lifeless room with its small files was a crude catalog system for my life. Here were written the actions of my every moment, big and small, in a detail my memory couldn't match. A sense of wonder and curiosity, coupled with horror, stirred within me as I began randomly opening files and exploring their content. Some brought joy and sweet memories; others a sense of shame and regret so intense that I would look over my shoulder to see if anyone was watching.
A file named "Friends" was next to one marked "Friends I have betrayed." The titles ranged from the mundane to the outright weird "Books I Have Read," "Lies I Have Told," "Comfort I have Given," "Jokes I Have Laughed at." Some were almost hilarious in their exactness: "Things I've yelled at my brothers." Others I couldn't laugh at: "Things I Have Done in My Anger", "Things I Have Muttered Under My Breath at My Parents." I never ceased to be surprised by the contents.
Often there were many more cards than I expected. Sometimes fewer than I hoped. I was overwhelmed by the sheer volume of the life I had lived. Could it be possible that I had the time in my years to fill each of these thousands or even millions of cards? But each card confirmed this truth. Each was written in my own handwriting. Each signed with my signature.
When I pulled out the file marked "TV Shows I have watched", I realized the files grew to contain their contents. The cards were packed tightly, and yet after two or three yards, I hadn't found the end of the file. I shut it, shamed, not so much by the quality of shows but more by the vast time I knew that file represented.
When I came to a file marked "Lustful Thoughts," I felt a chill run through my body. I pulled the file out only an inch, not willing to test its size and drew out a card. I shuddered at its detailed content.
I felt sick to think that such a moment had been recorded. An almost animal rage broke on me. One thought dominated my mind: No one must ever see these cards! No one must ever see this room! I have to destroy them!" In insane frenzy I yanked the file out. Its size didn't matter now. I had to empty it and burn the cards. But as I took it at one end and began pounding it on the floor, I could not dislodge a single card. I became desperate and pulled out a card, only to find it as strong as steel when I tried to tear it.
Defeated and utterly helpless, I returned the file to its slot. Leaning my forehead against the wall, I let out a long, self-pitying sigh.
And then I saw it. The title bore "People I Have Shared the Gospel With." The handle was brighter than those around it, newer, almost unused. I pulled on its handle and a small box not more than three inches long fell into my hands. I could count the cards it contained on one hand.
And then the tears came. I began to weep. Sobs so deep that they hurt. They started in my stomach and shook through me. I fell on my knees and cried. I cried out of shame, from the overwhelming shame of it all. The rows of file shelves swirled in my tear-filled eyes. No one must ever, ever know of this room. I must lock it up and hide the key. But then as I pushed away the tears, I saw Him.
No, please not Him. Not here. Oh, anyone but Jesus. I watched helplessly as He began to open the files and read the cards. I couldn't bear to watch His response. And in the moments I could bring myself to look at His face, I saw a sorrow deeper than my own.
He seemed to intuitively go to the worst boxes. Why did He have to read every one? Finally He turned and looked at me from across the room. He looked at me with pity in His eyes. But this was a pity that didn't anger me. I dropped my head, covered my face with my hands and began to cry again. He walked over and put His arm around me. He could have said so many things. But He didn't say a word. He just cried with me.
Then He got up and walked back to the wall of files. Starting at one end of the room, He took out a file and, one by one, began to sign His name over mine on each card. "No!" I shouted rushing to Him. All I could find to say was "No, no," as I pulled the card from Him. His name shouldn't be on these cards. But there it was, written in red so rich, so dark, so alive. The name of Jesus covered mine. It was written with His blood. He gently took the card back. He smiled a sad smile and began to sign the cards. I don't think I'll ever understand how He did it so quickly, but the next instant it seemed I heard Him close the last file and walk back to my side.
He placed His hand on my shoulder and said, "It is finished." I stood up, and He led me out of the room. There was no lock on its door. There were still cards to be written. - Brian Moore
If you love me..click to FEED MY FISH=)=)
"Finding the right person isn't about finding the right person- It's about becoming the right person!!!" - Just Friends
At this point in my life, forget love! I wanna fall in CHOCOLATE!!!
Verse of the Day
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My husband, Samuel, and I Married, May 9, 2015, Moved to Alaska, May 10, 2015 and then a few months later, on September 1st, 2015, we moved back to Tennessee. This blog is a collection of my crafts, creations and occasionally the crazy things that happen in our life as newlyweds ^_^
The Bible says you can know 100% that you will go to heaven when you die. How you ask?
1. You must Recognize Your Condition
Romans 3:23 "For all have sinned and come short of the glory of God." This means that NO ONE is good enough to go to Heaven on his (or her) own merit. No matter how much good we do, we still fall short of God's perfection.
Uh oh....that's not good....but read on!
2. You must also Relize the Penalty for Sin
Romans 6:23a "For the wages of sin is death...." This means that just as there are wages (payment) for good, there is punishment for wrong. The penalty for our sin is eternal death in a place called Hell.
Uh oh...still not good...but here comes the good....no...GREAT news!!!
3. You must Believe that Christ Died for You Romans 6:23b ".....but the GIFT of God is eternal life through Christ our Lord." Romans 10:13 "For whosoever (meaning anyone and everyone) shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved." This means that Everlasting life in Heaven is a gift purchased by the blood of Jesus and offered freely to those who call upon Him in faith.
If you would like to accept God's gift of eternal life all you have to do is ask God for it in prayer. (relize that it is not meere words that save you, but your faith that Jesus died for you.)
We'll help you word your prayer.
Dear Jesus, I know that I am a sinner. Please forgive me of my sins. Jesus, come into my heart and save my soul from Hell. I believe you died on the cross for my sins and I'm trusting in You, and You alone, to take me to Heaven when I die. Thank you for saving my soul. Amen
If you prayed this prayer please let us know so we can Rejoice with you!
Once you are saved, this does not mean you will never sin again. So when you do, pray and ask God to forgive you. He Saved you from past and future sins. You can never lose your salvation, once saved FOREVER saved!